Thursday, February 17, 2005

At What Cost?

I'm not a mother, and can not even begin to imagine the heartbreak endured by those who have had to make difficult decisions regarding the health and well being of their child. However, I will say that I found this to be extremely disturbing.

I understand a mother's desperate instinctual need to do everything possible to help her child, but at what cost to the child itself? It seems to me, and this is just my opinion here, that this child has absolutely no chance of survival or any kind of quality of life to look forward to. How can you be a truly loving and selfless mother to allow your child to suffer, just because you believe that your child is "telepathically" informing you of his will to live? It's not just the hospital and doctors treating this child that believe he has no chance, but 40 other medical facilities have concurred with the treating physician's diagnosis. At what point can you come to the realization that you must let your child die a dignified and peaceful death?

I truly admire women like Julia and Tertia who had to make these heartrending decisions regarding their own sons. It was not a decision either of them came to lightly, and they still mourn for their lost babies, despite having since been blessed with other children. Yet, they had the courage and love to let their sons go in a peaceful, thoughtful, and loving way. It was because they were mothers and had no desire to submit their children to a life of pain, that they could make the decision to let them go. Most mothers will tell you they would do anything to keep their child from harm and pain, and that is exactly what Julia and Tertia did.

If you believe that it is against God's will to "pull the plug" on this child, then I don't know what God you worship. My Lord is a loving soul, who does not wish the most innocent of creatures to suffer needlessly. Wouldn't you rather have your child exist in place without pain, in perfect love and peace, instead of selfishly keeping them bound to this plane where they can only know of life of suffering?

Sometimes, the most loving decisions are also the most heartbreaking. I do not mean to judge, as I said, I've never had to be placed in that situation, and pray I never will. But, after reading the stories of women who have made these choices in a dignified manner, I can only wonder what it is that makes someone think in a polar opposite way? If I have offended you, I apologize. I am however, genuinely curious to know your story if you are one who has chosen to prolong your child's life. Let me know where you're coming from, so that I can better understand. Help me to educate myself on both sides of this issue.

I wish peace upon all your hearts....

1 comment:

Sara said...

Oh man, she is a real winner. She wants to keep her child on life support, yet she hasn't seen him in over a month?!? What is that all about?!

I, too, believe that even though she is entitled to her feelings, that poor child will most likely not have a quality of life he deserves if he were to even wake up. I don't believe anyone should have to suffer needlessly like that.